Inspired Again

Not writing as much as I used to is quite bittersweet. But, you can’t rush or force creativity.

That’s one thing I’ve learned, the difficult way.

All in all, I am beginning to feel inspired again, which has been a wonderful feeling.

Finding that passion for writing once again, it gives you a reason to think positive and remain hopeful.

Like many things in life, it’s not always straightforward. Yet, I’m always up for a challenge.

Mila. Xo

Creative Blocks And Complex Minds

Found myself struggling to write, I know inspiration can/will happen at certain times, sometimes when you least expect it to. It has been challenging for a long time, though.

Self-expression used to be easier, especially in my younger years.

The older I become, the harder it gets, knowing what to say and how to articulate that. Emotions are complex, how it affects your actions, the choices you ultimately make.

Being self-aware is good, to some extent. Although, too much of a good thing can also be bad for you in the long run. It can definitely overwhelm your brain, all these thoughts.

Can’t wait for the weekend, if I’m honest.

Fingers crossed I can write something of use soon, we’ll see.

Mila. Xo

Typical Monday Feelings


It’s February 1st! Hello, we meet again.

Such a great start, but terribly frustrating end to this Monday evening.

It’s safe to say that I’m kind of done with certain companies and their glitchy websites. Trying to take a deep breath and relax my mind, but it’s difficult sometimes.

Anyway, I have a lot of things to do tomorrow, so wish me luck, that my thoughts don’t get the best of me. Life is so messy at times, but here’s to me trying to persevere through the challenges it brings along.

May all of you have a much better evening, take care and stay safe.

Mila. Xo

breaking points

okdIt starts with a simple trigger, and it ends with an emotional cry of defeat. A passive-aggressive mechanism mastered from the years and pieces of you broken off like you’re society’s doll, robotic to emotion and numb from the chemical imbalance of one’s mind.

What you saw in movies, it became your illusion, the safety blanket you never had as a child, but eventually, the rose-colored lens faded, and you saw the world in all the disgusting hues of reality. Blue became associated with sadness & your lover’s eyes, red became nothing but a reminder of the blood you lost, and the love that decayed along with it.

I wish life was like it seemed when childhood nightmares were only the majority of life’s problems, you could breathe oxygen without being constantly clouded by the loss of your beloved, oh how tragic it felt at the time, but as time goes, you start to feel the hatred building like the blocks you had as a kid, ain’t it funny how tables can twist and turn?

 

triple threat

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Been so inspired today, it got me thinking about book ideas & what I want it all to be like.
Continue reading “triple threat”

open letter to my 18 year old self

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Dear you,

It’s been a crazy time in life but it’s getting better each day, the chaos is still present but I know obstacles are there to help me face the fears I need to the most. I wish you were as confident as you are today, if only I knew the blossoming process of the heart would begin just after that specific moment in time. There’s been love, there’s been heartbreak, and most recently; the loss of the grandmother who shaped your heart into the one it is today. She’s at peace and no longer in pain and that’s what you should always remind yourself of in times of grief and sadness. It will hurt and the pain never truly goes away, but as you appreciate each day and each breath, you’ll be making her so proud way up from above.

Creativity wise, keep writing, never lose sight of your dreams and keep going until you reach that damn goal of yours. Poetry is not about what it brings you, but more about the joy it brings to write your heart out, regardless if you’re rambling or simply expressing.

Love on the other hand, is something you shouldn’t focus on too much right now. Focus on your own wellbeing before walking into the path of companionship. Appreciate the friends that have been there from day one and remember that life goes on no matter if someone leaves you or you leave them. I know you’re not in the right state of heart to love again, neither should you force yourself to be with someone for the sake of being in the company of anyone. Love at the right time, love the person who truly deserves you and let go of the ones who do not deserve your time and affection, because they don’t appreciate it, rather less than you originally had thought. Focus on you and you’ll be in a much happier place of mind because of it.

I thought writing this letter would be a good idea because I wish you knew how great life is and how good it can be, in the company of the right people and the family that loves you.

Life is a blossoming flower, for it to grow, you need to nurture the mind, feed the soul a lot of love and care, take care of the heart that beats for you and always appreciate each moment of life because you never know when it will end.

Big Dreams, Bigger Anxiety

 

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I am your typical human being – life is never perfect, my brain never stops thinking, my dreams are far yet longed for, and as usual, anxiety continues to rule my thoughts.
Continue reading “Big Dreams, Bigger Anxiety”