reflection

Back At It: Hiatus Over

Hello again, what a long time it has been since my last upload on the blog.

I wasn’t planning to have a hiatus of this length, but it is what it is and I am back with a vengeance.

Truthfully, I have struggled with writer’s block a lot for many months, even years at this point.

Life has been all over the place, so have my emotions. Not being able to convey or express how I’ve been feeling has affected me quite heavily.

I put a lot of pressure on myself in all aspect of life, whether it is my appearance or what my poems are about. The hunger for perfection is insatiable, to put it bluntly.

Creativity has always had a big place in my mind, heart and soul. So to feel like nothing I did was good enough was very taxing on my mental health and it still is, sometimes.

The goal is to take baby steps, and start off small and build my way back up the ladder once more. It might not always be consistent or on point, but it will be authentic to me and my journey of it all.

Just wanted to say a big thank you to anyone who has followed or just discovered my blog on here. Any engagement I receive is wholeheartedly appreciated. It truly means the world and encourages me to continue, even if I’m not feeling my best.

What are my plans for the months ahead?

As of now, I hope to update the blog at least once a week, if not more. It all depends on life’s schedule and God’s plan for me on this path.

I count my blessings every day that I have good health, a wonderful support system and an overall decent life.

That’s not to say that there won’t be challenges along the way, but I will take that on if the occasion arises.

For the time being, I want to remain present and in tune with the universe so a hiatus like the previous one is out of the question.

Balance is key, which an impatient person like me needs to be reminded of on a daily basis.

It is my hope that I can commence further work on my third poetry collection, and make progress with that as it has been four years since A Cryptic Human Entity.

Well, as of tomorrow it will be the 4th anniversary of that second poetry book and I still cannot fathom it.

The theme for the next book is still up for debate. I feel like a lot has changed and evolved since my initial concept for it, that I might do something completely different.

I have a lot that I want to share and heal from on an emotional level, timing is key too.

There’s a chance I might do a mini version of the next collection, and a full, extended edition of the poetry book next year. So excited to finally start this project in a proper way.

Until then, stay tuned for more updates as I go along. After all, we only have the life God gave us, we need to make every second count.

And also, happy belated 7th anniversary to my pride and joy, this little blog of mine, DAYDREAM MADNESS.

It’s also my birthday in 12 days, how exciting! But anyway, hope you all have an amazing rest of your weekend and I’ll speak to you soon.

Happy Sunday and God bless you all!

Yours truly,

Mila. Xo

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Life Changes & Inner Peace: Resolutions For 2022

Hello again, fellow writers and blog readers.

Christmas is now over, and everyone is slowly preparing for their NYE festivities, whatever that may look like. It’s also that time of year where we all reflect on the current year before it ends, and what we hope to discover in the next.

Personally, I love making these types of lists. But, I do want these resolutions to matter in the long run. Life changes don’t just have to happen every January onwards.

I’ll probably have my fair share of moments where I don’t sleep well, or meditate enough, things like that. But to be honest, I’m human and nothing is ever perfect.

Learning to be mindful and living in the present moment is important, to balance out the discipline and expectations we all have/expect of ourselves.

Without further delay, here are my top 5 (or 10, haha) resolutions/life changes that I want to incorporate into my daily routine and improve my current lifestyle.

1. To sleep better
2. Eat more mindfully
3. Read more books
4. Save more, spend less
5. Prioritize my mental health

Another five, because why not?

6. Declutter the house/wardrobe
7. Write more consistently
8. Start work on poetry book #3
9. Get more active
10. Meditate/journal

These are in no particular order, might I add.

I had many more I could mention, but these are the most relevant to my life at this moment. It doesn’t matter if I don’t successfully achieve all these things, as long as I am aware of my goals and at least trying to be the best version of myself. A journey like this is not always straightforward, but it is possible when the timing is right.

Would love to hear about what your own resolutions are for 2022. Or if you’ve decided not to participate in it this year, it’s fine either way.

This might be my last post of 2021, although I probably will post something on NYE as a farewell to what has been a strange year, to say the least.

Love,

Mila. Xo

I Passed My Course!

This post is going to be more upbeat and positive than the last few (or perhaps I should say ten?)

Yes, still got a lot of things on my mind currently which has been very challenging and awful for my mental health, but I’m still trying to get through life with gratitude and strength.

So, that being said: I passed my course!

Not entirely surprised, I did have a good feeling about taking the exam, so that was nice.

Excuse the lateness of my recent posts on the blog. A lot is on my mind, so bear with me.

Have a great evening, everyone.

Mila. Xo

Hello Again, May

Happy 1st of May, everyone.

Starting a new month on the weekend is always fun, yet strange in the way that you almost lose track of which day it is.

Nonetheless, I’m trying to appreciate the time I have to destress and get stuff done. Luckily, there’s not much to do, a very positive thing if I must say say so myself.

Plus, it’s a Bank Holiday weekend, so three days instead of two.

This is one of those months where I’m kind of stuck in the middle, emotionally. Many great things to be grateful for, although I miss my late grandmother terribly during this time.

For that reason, the 19th hurts to think about. And my birthday is a week and a day later, so celebrating that feels awkward, but I know my grandmother is in a better place, and she lived a long and unique life, one of the most inspiring women I have ever known to exist, in my eyes.

Grief is hard to navigate, even now, almost five years on.

Our guardian angels are protecting us from above, I know that much by now. And so is the Lord, he works in mysterious ways to guide us and strengthen us.

Have a wonderful Saturday.

Mila. Xo

All Or None

I have a complicated relationship with many things in life, which has been a struggle and a half, sometimes. The mind is a strange part of you.

To say emotions are complex is an understatement, understanding them can take a lifetime. In my own experience, it’s very confusing and there’s mixed signals all over.

As you navigate through life, expectations and comparisons arise, more so than ever, which in itself can be daunting. This definitely lives rent-free in my mind, truth be told.

What also becomes evidently obvious is that, we live in a society that puts a timeframe on all achievements, and you’re the odd one out if things aren’t according to schedule.

In my opinion, planning ahead seems pointless at times. We don’t ever have our lives entirely figured out, and if we do, will that last? Maybe, or not.

The older I get, the more I try to shake off that idealistic image of how things should be, to appreciate the scenery in front of me, and the people I get to share these moments with.

Expectations beyond the realistic is a recipe for disaster, it’s not anywhere near sustainable in the long run. That being said, the opinion of this will vary from person to person, as it should.

Anyway, excuse the deep and emotive post tonight, I honestly didn’t know what to write about in the beginning. However, getting back to basics and talking more about these subjects is something that I am aiming to do on this blog of mine.

When I look back on older posts, I do miss being able to express myself in such an honest way. Of course, there’s boundaries and ways to talk about it all in a constructive and structured manner.

I’ll be talking about more light-hearted topics tomorrow, I just needed to get it off my chest, to be honest.

All in all, I’ll leave it at that and I hope you’re all having a great Wednesday!

Mila. Xo

Melancholy Nights

It’s one of those nights, once again.

Emotions can be complicated, it can also be a difficult thing to talk about when you’re overwhelmed as it is. However, in some ironic way, sometimes that’s the only way I can write. And it’s important to not suppress how you feel either.

I’m currently in the process of writing for the next poetry book, although at this point, when this will be unveiled or released, not too sure.

However, despite feeling less than ideal, I wanted to come on here and just distract myself from my thoughts for a moment. Writing has always been such a good outlet, in many ways.

Anyway, I’ll probably end the post at this for now, until tomorrow.

Take care, stay safe, be kind to yourself and others.

Mila. Xo

Impulsive Moments & Rational Conclusions

Sometimes, taking a moment to think before we do or say something is the difference between wrong and right choices in life. At times, I can find myself being impulsive, in terms of buying certain things or making a change somehow (hair bleach sessions included)

Almost bleached my hair earlier, funnily enough. Until I styled my hair in a different way, which made me appreciate my brunette, messy curls. Tomorrow is Easter Sunday, so I’m looking forward to that.

Faith is such a big part of my daily life, more so with each day that passes by. Makes me so grateful for the people in my life and the positive changes that have occurred in recent years. And I also believe it keeps me close to my late grandmother. In May, it’ll be the fifth anniversary of her passing and that’s so surreal.

I just hope I make her proud, on this complicated journey of life and experiences.

Mila. Xo

Long Weekend

Happy Friday, to all of you. I hope it’s been a good start to your weekend.

Found myself taking naps a lot during the day, I felt like it was needed, and now here I am, making another late night addition to the blog. This has been such a wonderful Friday, a good one indeed.

As it’s Good Friday, I definitely wanted to spend some time reflecting, nurturing my mind and soul with mindful thinking and it’s very beneficial, in a lot of ways.

I feel so blessed to have my family and friends in my life, they are the most important people ever, when things change and we can see each other again, in a more consistent way, things will definitely improve for the better.

Mila. Xo

Journey Of Complex Emotions


A simple note to self: it’s okay to feel emotive.

I’ve found it difficult at times to express how I feel, even through my poetry and such. An outlet of any kind is a blessing, it’s not something I take for granted anymore.

Sometimes, a good cry or laugh is necessary.

Can’t wait to start writing more for book #3, it’s been pushed aside for too long, in my opinion. There’s a lot of comfort in creativity in the form of escapism and peace of mind.

Anyway, I’ll leave the rambling for another moment in time, for now, I’ve got to fall asleep in a timely manner. Hope you’re all safe and well.

Mila. Xo