Late Bloomer’s Anthem: That Girl In The Corner

Although I’ve been writing every day, updating the blog on a regular basis turned out to be less ideal. Told myself it’s okay to not write constantly.

Despite my brain working hard, and barely thinking straight, I’ve kept myself calm and collected.

Having such an anxious mind can be a challenge. People will look at you, and think you’re a mess for it. I’m personally tired of criticizing myself.

For a long time, I was treated horribly by many people. Telling people no made me feel guilt on the highest degree, taking the time to heal felt like too much to ask for.

Learning to accept yourself and embrace the person you are, that’s a long process in itself. In the end, you’ll be grateful for the tough journey.

In the last six months, I’ve discovered strength within, that I never knew I had.

Found out the real meaning behind life, what it means to be living.

I’m only now starting to experience life in all its glory. Better a late bloomer than none at all. Soon enough, I’ll become the version of me I was destined to be, all along.

No, it doesn’t make me any less or any more. If anything, what didn’t kill my hope, it only strengthens mine with time.

There are things I have yet to improve, and I’m fully aware as it is.

Being weak in the flesh is nothing new. We’re perfectly imperfect, and sometimes you just have to keep moving forward.

Hoping 2019 brings love, happiness and so much more, to each and every one of you.

Forgiving And Forgetting: I Never Could

I had a hard time forgiving people in the past. To this day, I still do.

Yes, forgiveness is important, a crucial part of letting go, making amends, being the bigger person when it comes to conflict.

But for the most part, there are things I struggle to forgive, or forget. My heart will always try and see the good in people, no matter how much they frustrate me and betray me.

It’s the same with family feuds, drama on the horizon. How do you simply let bygones be exactly that?

You know in your heart, that you want to do right. But in the end, you simply can’t win. That’s the reality we’re living. An inevitable route, a road not easily driven past. It’s weird, really.

Can you ever truly forgive and forget completely?

Gratitude Hour

More so than ever, I have found myself on this journey of acceptance and discovery.

I had to learn how to let go, understand that there are many things I cannot change, no matter how much it pains me, to know this very crucial information.

Above all, it opened my eyes to clarity, inspiration and commitment. Not only to myself, but the ones who need me.

A wonderful day spent, indeed.

Fragile Aspects Of Life

Life is nothing like we envisioned, as little children. We’ve been taught to believe that we’re just a puzzle piece to place, another foundation to lay.

Our state of mind crumbles, as we see the world for what it is. Disguised as a flaw, seen as a weakness.

Instead of encouraging one another, we have been programmed to function, in a different manner.

We’re motivated by our greed, the pressure to succeed is inevitably a weight on our shoulders.

If only some of us had the voice or the courage to break the stigma, once and for all. But of course, talking about taboo subjects is another challenge, in place.

Anyone who does, I’m forever intrigued and inspired by you.

It Takes You Home

When I was little, I spent a lot of quality time with my grandmother.

She used to knit, whilst I cut up old pieces of clothing to sew together a little cotton bag for myself, or two.

Looking back on it now, it truly sinks in, the realization that you’re gone.

No longer do I see, the smile that lit up the room. Your loving words of encouragement as I began to blossom, like the butterflies in your garden.

Our moments, I cherish more than I ever knew my heart could. This is the reality of losing you.

Benefit Of The Doubt

In all my years of trying to find the right words to say, it has never been so clear to me before.

This journey of mine was a test, it continues to be.

And there is no doubt in my mind that people will continue to analyze my quiet and reserved nature.

They’ll pick it apart, piece by piece. I definitely will be under a microscope.

However, there is a lot people will underestimate. My cautious sense of instinct, I observe you without even saying a word.

It takes a complex life to understand the complexity of others around you.

Sure, I don’t have a degree, but my knowledge of the ones around me is on point. You think I have no voice, think again.

Break Of Hiatus: Society’s A Hypocrite

 

It’s been way too long since I’ve posted a blog post, and I’m sorry about that.

Let’s just say that, life has been hectic for the most part. There is a lot I could add, but I don’t want this to be all about my personal and non-personal issues etc.

But, in the near future, I might feel comfortable sharing a bit more. Anyway, it is SO good to be back writing and expressing my thoughts on DAYDREAM MADNESS.

 

A lot has been going on lately, or, as I like to describe my view of it…

 

an unpredictable cycle, of impulse versus instinct”.

 

On the bright side, my new poetry book is out, I’m slowly (but surely) looking for work to pay more bills off, working on a third collection of poems or stories, to publish this year- or the next. As well as, trying to work on my self-esteem and confidence, because having anxiety over every little thing is a nightmare, when inside of your heart, you know what you want and need out of life, but you’re so lost in your own insecurities, that reaching a little bit higher on the cupboard of life is scary.

 

It’s not that I’m lazy or whatever else people like to call me or define me by. If anything, I’m an extrovert living in an introverted, insecure shell of thought. And it really doesn’t help when certain people define me as something I am not, or when they pile the bricks on, just to step on me further.

 

Why should different rules apply for different people?

 

Aren’t we equal human beings; some richer, some poorer. Some younger, some older. It certainly does get on my last nerve, when people drag you into the dirt, instead of reaching their hand out to help you out of it.

 

Society is the biggest hypocrite – and I’m a part of it, nonetheless. We feed the monster that confines us in our comfort zones and limited spaces. Perhaps not on purpose, but we certainly play a big part.

 

 

 

My Blog Is Three Years Old Soon?

Hi, hello. I always say I’m going to write a post and then I just never live up to my promises. Sorry about that. On another note, this blog is almost THREE years old.

Yes.

There is a lot of emotions attached, I must admit. Especially since, this is the longest
I have ever updated and kind of preserved a blog for. Plus, there’s a domain name on here, which is nearly a year old, bought on this blog’s second anniversary date.

I make it sound like it’s my soulmate or something, but this blog has been a vital part of my life in recent years. Not only has it been an emotive outlet in times of need, it has also helped me be more confident in sharing certain things about myself, my writing, life in general.

And it wasn’t always straightforward, in the beginning. When this was first created in May 2015, it had a bunch of theme changes, layout/font experimentation, blog title- changes, untilĀ DAYDREAM MADNESS was chosen and I fell in love with it. Basically.

It might actually be the title of my third book of poetry, when I eventually publish and release “A Cryptic Human Entity”, for all the world to see for themselves. But, I don’t know, I like to take things one day at a time.

Although, it is nice to plan out in your head, all of these exciting ideas.

Creativity is such a wonderful thing most times, depending on your use of it.

Anyway, that’s enough writing for now. I’ll maybe write a shorter post later today, or tomorrow. It all depends if I’m not in pain because of this tooth issue I’ve been having recently.

 

Mila xo

Deadlines Are Not My Thing

I am a problematic soul, oh my. First of all, I’m supposed to be publishing my new book of poetry next month and I’m still writing material for it. Now, most people freak out about it, but me? This is nothing new. For some reason, I like the danger of possibly missing deadlines. At school, I did a lot of things last-minute or later than that.

And it’s not because I don’t have things to say. I do. Too many things, actually. From next month, I’m going to try and write a lot more on this blog too. Really want a camera as well, to capture things, or potential memories. Life has been hectic, not going to lie.

Truly grateful for the friends that have given me that extra ounce of support recently.

I have a dentist appointment tomorrow, which I am not looking forward to, but I do want to fix the little problems that have been bothering me for the past few years.

Again, if you follow my blog on here, I want to specifically say thank you and I promise to write more often shortly. It’s all a work in progress at the moment. Any views, comments and likes are highly appreciated by me, and it definitely motivates me to continue adding content on here.

Have a wonderful Wednesday, fellow writers and of course; awesome readers.

Mila.