Cursed Is The Girl

People always used to tell me, that a creative child usually becomes a troubled adult.

Well, I used to dismiss the theory. It seemed cliché to me, at least, during my teenage years.

Maybe, that was the denial talking. I’ve always wanted to get down to the root cause, but there has been many examples of it.

I often find myself too involved, the mind can play tricks if you allow it, but it can also help you untangle past behaviors, patterns that seem to align, things you simply can’t shake off.

If my brain was an internal drive, which in many ways, it is, I doubt it would be in a solid state.

As technology progresses, I hope it evolves in a way that changes lives and enhances their sense of knowledge in more ways than just one or the other.

The other thing I find myself worrying about, is the high expectations on my shoulders and the validation that comes along with it, or lack of, if I’m honest.

Inside The Box

I’m a little hesitant about tomorrow. I know I probably shouldn’t be, yet in the back of my mind, I am.

The little whispers of self-doubt can be hard to ignore. I am my own worst enemy at times, I kid you not.

But, with small steps and a lot of pushing myself into the right direction, I’m hoping that I will conquer some of these thoughts in due time.

Of course, you have to be realistic with it. I’ll definitely try my hardest to have an open mind, yet cautious brain.

Late Bloomer’s Anthem: That Girl In The Corner

Although I’ve been writing every day, updating the blog on a regular basis turned out to be less ideal. Told myself it’s okay to not write constantly.

Despite my brain working hard, and barely thinking straight, I’ve kept myself calm and collected.

Having such an anxious mind can be a challenge. People will look at you, and think you’re a mess for it. I’m personally tired of criticizing myself.

For a long time, I was treated horribly by many people. Telling people no made me feel guilt on the highest degree, taking the time to heal felt like too much to ask for.

Learning to accept yourself and embrace the person you are, that’s a long process in itself. In the end, you’ll be grateful for the tough journey.

In the last six months, I’ve discovered strength within, that I never knew I had.

Found out the real meaning behind life, what it means to be living.

I’m only now starting to experience life in all its glory. Better a late bloomer than none at all. Soon enough, I’ll become the version of me I was destined to be, all along.

No, it doesn’t make me any less or any more. If anything, what didn’t kill my hope, it only strengthens mine with time.

There are things I have yet to improve, and I’m fully aware as it is.

Being weak in the flesh is nothing new. We’re perfectly imperfect, and sometimes you just have to keep moving forward.

Hoping 2019 brings love, happiness and so much more, to each and every one of you.

Stepping Back Into It: Perfectionist Issues

Taking the time to sit down and write something each day is refreshing, to say the very least. For most of last year, I found it impossible to put my ideas into perspective.

As someone who has written for most of her life, I am constantly looking for ways to improve my work, and I definitely found myself editing my words more than usual, rarely satisfied or content with the end result. Maybe, I’m just a perfectionist.

I am hoping that 2019 will put my mind at ease, a little bit. To not worry about people’s opinions so much, and to remember that I am just a human being who is trying to bring herself joy through self-expression as a whole.

This blog has helped me in many ways, which I am forever grateful for. And I met some incredible souls because of it. Can you believe it’s been almost 4 years since I started? Neither can I.

May you all have an amazing year ahead of you.