Emotive Tuesday



Slightly mixed feelings about today.

Certain things have changed, which I only found out via a brief phone call.

Lack of communication can be incredibly frustrating, but I suppose that’s how it is sometimes. That said, I do still have hope. How much of it I’ll have left as time goes on, only time will tell. For the time being, I remain neutral on the subject.

I doubt I’ll sleep much, so I’ll probably be writing, possibly be checking my emails and completing math work for my online course, take my mind off the stress.

Remaining positive is the main objective, although it can be difficult when your emotions are all over the place. What usually helps me is music, writing on the blog and staying hydrated. (In my case, it’s water)

What I listen to is very much influenced by how I feel, as it is for most people, right? Anyway, I still have a lot to be grateful for, and mindful of.

Remember to take a deep breath, be kind to yourself and others.

Have a safe and wonderful Tuesday.


Mila. Xo



Monday Gratitude



Today was meant to be Blue Monday, and for the first time in years I can honestly say, it really wasn’t too bad. Start of the week can be a bit slow and tiring, although that’s not unusual.

Been quite productive too, which I’m pleased about. Got up early, took my supplements, all that fun, morning routine stuff. I’ve tried to keep myself organized and punctual, so I don’t forget anything important.

Weather’s quite cold, it seems like it’s raining all the time during the night, either that or the wind is howling. Either way, none of that has impacted my routine so far.

My first online lesson went okay, although I think there was an issue with the audio on my end of the line. I’ve got some things I need to do before Thursday, which is something I am looking forward to a lot.

Almost reached my water intake goal for the day also, still not entirely keen on it, but I have noticed a difference in my skin, although the hyperpigmentation is something I need to sort out at some point.

Been watching a lot of videos about skincare and I have learned a lot since then. Knowing these key ingredients and what they help with has been incredibly beneficial and it helps me understand my own skin a lot more, and how to protect it well.

I’m hoping to fall asleep soon, fingers crossed. Stay safe, everyone.


Mila. Xo

Weekend Blues



Yet again, the weekend comes to an end.


I’m going to try my best to get some sleep. On a positive note, today has been really good. I am hoping this will continue as the new week begins tomorrow.

We’re almost two weeks into January, how crazy is that?

Hope everyone has a wonderful day/evening and I’ll speak to you soon, on the next blog post on DAYDREAM MADNESS. I’ll try and post the next one earlier than all the others posted this week.

For some reason, I prefer writing late at night. It’s a preference until I have like 30 minutes until midnight to get a post up on the site. Oh, the stress.


Mila. Xo

Quick Write For Tonight



I figured I would create a little post before I forget. It’s been so great to write every day and to end my streak of inspiration now would be a total waste.

It’s wonderful not to be plagued by writer’s block anymore, or at least not as much of it as I used to have. Sometimes, I suppose, you can get caught up in life’s constant pace of change and stress. Also, writing at night seems to be my time to let it be known.

Not sure if being a midnight owl again is going to benefit me in the long run, but I feel like myself again, in a strange way. Typing away to my heart’s content. A comforting time, in spite of current events in the world and home, one of the many differences in lockdown, third time around.

Had quite the productive day, dealt with the most important household chores, made sure to eat and stay hydrated. I’ve found the strength to get through the changing of habits, in which I wanted to sort out for the longest time.

This has been an interesting week, if I’m honest. Staying on the right track of things might be hard at times, but with determination and a positive mindset, I feel confident that I can do this.

Before I end my little post on the blog, I just want to say thank you to anyone who reads what I have to say on here. This has always been a sanctuary for my thoughts and opinions, hopefully it can be of some comfort for you too.

Writing has been a passion of mine for years, more than ever in times of hardship. It’s kind of like an online journal of sorts, it’s always comforting to have a safe space, whether it’s a journal, a blog or any other kind of platform.

Stay safe, everyone.


Mila. Xo

Hoping For Better Days

I do find myself focused on gratitude, more often than previously.

Off to sleep shortly, and I’m hoping for a clearer mind and inspired heart tomorrow.

There’s a lot to be grateful for, and I’m trying not to forget that. May you all have a blessed night, or day, depending on your timezone.

Love,

Mila.

Existence & Purpose

When you lose your identity in the recycling bin, how do you find that part of you again?

I’m beginning to think, I have a long way to go.

Ever since I can remember, I associated my willingness to help others as my main source of purpose.

On this journey, I have come to understand everything a lot clearer.

It’s hard to articulate this in a way that wouldn’t offend. I’ve suppressed it all to the point where I just go along with the chaos. I don’t like it, even freaks me out most days. Back in the day, this blog was my only sanctuary for all these thoughts. It still is, but to a lesser extent.

To share is one thing, it’s one of the only things that make sense anymore.

Everything else is a blank, quite honestly. I could write a book about this, my mind is an abyss of thought, a lot of it has never been fully dissected nor processed.

To say that I am currently lost in the archive is an understatement. There’s so much I have yet to learn, to see, to experience.

I often wonder, what is my purpose, guide me to where I am meant to stand.

Is this modern world for an old soul like mine? Who knows.

Anyway, excuse the rambling. This is the first blog post where I haven’t been feeling empty. Let’s hope the new decade brings a lot of better days.

Love,

Mila. Xo

High Expectations And Validation From Within

This has been a constant note to self since 2020 began, almost two weeks ago. You don’t need validation from others to be happy.

It doesn’t mean you’re not going to try and get it from other people, or find peace of mind in it. I often compare it to an abyss, the anxieties and self-doubt that comes from the need of validation is not at all helpful.

So many times, I have felt in need of it, and I still don’t understand why, and sure, there are people who have different qualities and different skills, comparing myself to them will only hold me back from achieving what I know in my heart, that I am capable of. It is easier said than done, but with enough patience and faith, anything is possible. And it will happen, when it is meant to.

Until then, I’ll just have to be patient and kind to myself.

The Human Experience

My blog was created almost five years ago, it’s amazing how it has shaped my life in many ways. I used to write all the time, staying awake late thinking about new theme layouts and blog post ideas. Those were the days of limitless creativity.

If anything, I’d love to go back to that. I also hope it will guide me through the writing process for my next poetry book. It might take months, or even years to finish my current project, but in the meantime, just updating my blog consistently and breaking free of the recurring periods of writer’s block.

All you can do is encourage, yet allow that creative mind to express and create at its own pace. I am definitely an impatient person, depending on the situation, of course.

It’s only the beginning, and I have so much left to give. I won’t give up.

The Peace That Comes With Age

As I near my 25th birthday, there’s a lot of emotions running wild inside my brain right now. Let me tell you, adult life is not as incredible as young me used to think. If you’re in a rush to be of age, don’t fret about it all too much.

There’s a difference between wanting to be older, and being it. Sure, many great opportunities and memories will come your way. Well, all our experiences won’t be the same, or any less complex, but I suppose, that’s the beauty of not knowing what the universe has in store for all of us.

Whilst the year is still in bloom, I’ll most likely do my best to ensure I don’t get lost in the resolutions I will inevitably break, the weight that’ll shed as slow as a turtle makes their way, and the poetry book that won’t be finished until the end of the year or beyond.

I try to be patient with myself, and the journey that life has brought me on. Although, it never does get easier. Being able to express my thoughts again has definitely been the light at the end of this dark tunnel of worry.

Analysis: Life, Poetry & Mindfulness

Commencing work on my third poetry book project has been harder than anticipated.

Originally, it was meant to have a 2019 release date, but I definitely didn’t want to rush any creative work of mine that has a meaningful message.

And it will also help me document a lot of difficult emotions that I have the want to express, and thoughts I’ve kept away in the archive of my mind.

The older I get, the more I miss the consistency of my writing over the years.

Also, focusing on mindfulness and self-care is on my list. I’ll explain more over the weekend.

Until then, I wish you all a wonderful evening.