Here I am, trying to finish my bottles of water needed, in order to complete my intake goal. Also recently started intermittent fasting, so the hydration is very important during these vital hours.
Working on my health has been a priority, and it will continue to be on the agenda as the year goes on, and I become fitter and healthier, not to mention, more confident with my body.
Insecurities suck, but I’m trying to work on those things gradually, understand what has to be addressed and improved. It’s not just the physical aspect, but the psychological as well. It’ll take patience with myself, something I often don’t have.
A sensitive topic for many, I’m sure. To be clear, I’m simply expressing my own experiences with it, but the subject can be complicated for many different reasons. The stigma, the shaming, the unrealistic standards we deal with on a regular basis. It can be a lot for a person.
As we evolve and grow, become wiser and stronger, I am certain that these things will be more understood as time goes on. Hold on to that hope.
I promised myself I would write each day on the blog, not because I have anything in particular to express, but with 2020 being such an inactive year on DAYDREAM MADNESS, I wanted 2021 to be different.
The comfort it brings, a very precious gift. As the nights get colder, my mind seems to be all over the place. It is nice to simply feel calm and at peace.
Being kind to yourself and taking life one step at a time is vital sometimes.
Hello again, blogging universe.
I am finally back with a new blog post, after what feels like a lifetime of not being able to express my thoughts out in the open.
It’s less than an hour until midnight, and my birthday is around the corner. Yes, the big 2-5. I know, not as special as someone’s 21st or 30th and so forth, but I wanted to get back into writing again, and tonight felt like the right time to do so.
To say that I have been creatively blocked is an understatement. In fact, I have found it increasingly difficult to express myself in the written form.
To whoever reads my post, thank you for sticking around. I plan to make an effort in the months to come. My third poetry book is still a work in progress, I’m working on a lot of things at the moment, much of it has to do with learning to find balance and peace.
But, as I’m sure most poeple know, it can be hard. The older I get, the more I have gratitude for the small things that make life so wonderful. The good, bad and ugly.
With time, you definitely learn to see things from a different perspective, the clarity can be very bittersweet at times, but that’s a part of our journey.
I am so grateful for the people who are in my life at this moment. You are truly magnificent.
Anyway, excuse my rambling on. I’m just thrilled to be here. My beloved blog recently turned 5, on the 13th of May and I often find it strange how fast time has gone by.
I’ll end this post by saying: take care of yourself, and have a wonderful day/night.
Inspiration can strike at any given time or place. Expected and unexpected.
Truth be told, I have often found myself waking up in the middle of a dream or short-lived nap, and suddenly, having this need to express what I have seen or felt during this particular state of mind.
My thoughts are complex, but not always.
Anyway, I’m hoping to sleep at some point in the night, so I wish you all the best, and sleep well (or good morning to the ones just waking up)
People always used to tell me, that a creative child usually becomes a troubled adult.
Well, I used to dismiss the theory. It seemed cliché to me, at least, during my teenage years.
Maybe, that was the denial talking. I’ve always wanted to get down to the root cause, but there has been many examples of it.
I often find myself too involved, the mind can play tricks if you allow it, but it can also help you untangle past behaviors, patterns that seem to align, things you simply can’t shake off.
If my brain was an internal drive, which in many ways, it is, I doubt it would be in a solid state.
As technology progresses, I hope it evolves in a way that changes lives and enhances their sense of knowledge in more ways than just one or the other.
The other thing I find myself worrying about, is the high expectations on my shoulders and the validation that comes along with it, or lack of, if I’m honest.
I’m a little hesitant about tomorrow. I know I probably shouldn’t be, yet in the back of my mind, I am.
The little whispers of self-doubt can be hard to ignore. I am my own worst enemy at times, I kid you not.
But, with small steps and a lot of pushing myself into the right direction, I’m hoping that I will conquer some of these thoughts in due time.
Of course, you have to be realistic with it. I’ll definitely try my hardest to have an open mind, yet cautious brain.
When you lose your identity in the recycling bin, how do you find that part of you again?
I’m beginning to think, I have a long way to go.
Ever since I can remember, I associated my willingness to help others as my main source of purpose.
On this journey, I have come to understand everything a lot clearer.
It’s hard to articulate this in a way that wouldn’t offend. I’ve suppressed it all to the point where I just go along with the chaos. I don’t like it, even freaks me out most days. Back in the day, this blog was my only sanctuary for all these thoughts. It still is, but to a lesser extent.
To share is one thing, it’s one of the only things that make sense anymore.
Everything else is a blank, quite honestly. I could write a book about this, my mind is an abyss of thought, a lot of it has never been fully dissected nor processed.
To say that I am currently lost in the archive is an understatement. There’s so much I have yet to learn, to see, to experience.
I often wonder, what is my purpose, guide me to where I am meant to stand.
Is this modern world for an old soul like mine? Who knows.
Anyway, excuse the rambling. This is the first blog post where I haven’t been feeling empty. Let’s hope the new decade brings a lot of better days.
Creativity is both a blessing and a curse.
Well, I’m not completely good at writing. I love it with a passion, despite the competitive nature of the craft.
The freedom to openly express your train of thought, it is a wonderful part of the whole process. There are good days, blank days, sometimes you have no direction.
I’m not a perfect writer, nor do I claim to be. It’s complicated, like most hobbies and interests.
Being an introvert and poetic isn’t very helpful either. One day at a time, I’m hoping to appreciate my work more, and to worry less about everything.
Being a self-proclaimed perfectionist is a challenge. You won’t stop until you’re different from everyone else.
I always find myself writing late at night. There’s something about the peace and solitude that comes with it.
To be honest, writing consistently again has been a joy. I certainly do hope that it continues.
For some reason, it’s easier to get all your thoughts down in the hours where you should be getting sleep.
I’m not necessarily the kind to have insomnia, but at certain moments, the aftermath of it all does take a toll. At other times, I honestly have never felt better in my entire life.
The complexity of my mind is something I have come to embrace and cherish. As the years have gone by, and I’ve matured and seen things in a different light, from a new perspective, it has taught me a lot about my surroundings, and about my own individual self.
It’s kind of true, hardships do make you feel stronger in the long run. Life can be a challenge, and if anything, I’m ready for it now.
The only way to conquer your fears is to face them. I’m determined to face all of mine, at a steady pace. And I’ll do so, with my faith and clarity in hand.
For anyone who’s up late, I’m with you on that one.
Love, Mila. Xo
Another decade has begun, and I am so ready to make it my own. The last ten years were definitely a challenge at times, sometimes a bitter to swallow.
All in all, I’m still grateful for the experience, as difficult as it was to endure.
You learn so much about yourself in times of predicament, the obstacles seemed like they would never stop blocking my path.
I honestly felt like I lost myself in the abyss of self-doubt. There were months where I couldn’t think, or even write. For the last half of 2019, I neglected my blog as a result.
Not being able to express what I was going through, it was agony for a writer like me. All I wanted to do was sit down and spill my thoughts, so I wouldn’t feel so overwhelmed about all the things, that were happening around me.
It felt like my head could explode, that’s how heavy it was, to bear all this on these shoulders of mine.
This next decade, I want to do things a lot differently. For starters, starting work on my next project is on my list.
Resolutions and such, I’ll talk about on my next blog post tomorrow. For now, I just want to wish everyone a Happy New Year.
I hope 2020 is the start of something beautiful and bright.