Might be a blog post, or a rant, perhaps a poem that sounds out of sync. We’ll see…Continue reading
Nostalgia and apathy, contradictory mix of the mind’s emotional response, and lack thereof. Workouts and staying productive takes the edge off to some extent.
I don’t know what’s worse, suppression of this reality or accepting that these thoughts and feelings exist?
Both are equally hard to navigate. If only I could articulate them into words and make art of it all. I always find it easier to write about darker subjects, or so it used to be.
Might look into writing submissions and story competitions, get my creativity in shape, as silly as that may sound. I understand you have to go with the flow, but my impatience can make that very difficult.
On a lighter note, I just realized that tomorrow marks three years since I published my second poetry collection via Blurb, A Cryptic Human Entity.
I can’t believe it, honestly. Three whole years tomorrow.
Will post a link to it on the next post, to commemorate this beautiful, precious moment in time. You can also find it quite easily online.
I do regret the lack of promotion when it first was published, but again, there was a lot going on in life the first months of it being out for the world to see.
That being said, I’ll always be proud of my work, regardless of who buys it or what happens next. For me, just holding the book in my hands was incredible and emotional.
Writing has always been a part of my life, something I hold near and dear to my heart and soul. I’m not the best at it, but I’ve still got a lot of learning and growing to do. My story is still being written as we speak.
It has gotten me through a lot of difficult times, so has this blog of mine too. It’s not just self-expression or art in written form, it’s therapy, a sanctuary.
Productive Days Are Good
This will probably be a short blog entry for the time being, but I’m hoping to get an early start tomorrow morning and write more in depth, as well as get a lot of other things done too.
Can’t believe my birthday is in 16 days, not that I’m counting down, necessarily. Although, it is very strange at times. You’re only as young as you are in this moment, or so I’ve heard over the years.
It would be interesting to know what life would look like in the future, the not knowing part of it all does bother me, until I tend to ask myself this question: Do I really want to know my future?
Yes, and no.
I’m sure a lot of people are possibly curious about this type of thing, right?
It’s natural to think about it as you get older and wiser, life is a journey, after all. And life’s set of scenarios lead us down our own customized path.
Perhaps, it’s not up to us. I keep an open mind and heart when it comes to that, because all I want is peace of mind, above anything else, if I’m being completely blunt.
But to end this post on a positive note, I have learned so much in the last couple of years, and I just hope to keep learning, growing, blossoming into the person I was destined to be at the right time.
Have a great Tuesday and stay well!
Journey Of Acceptance
Do you ever hear or see something that leaves you in a deep train of thought for the rest of the evening? That’s so me tonight.
I think I’ve managed to navigate my emotions to a happier place, for the time being. How long that will last, who knows, but I appreciate it and try to embrace it.
Emotions can be so complex and hard to navigate, process and understand in a logical way. Truth be told, that has been me many times.
As I’m getting older, the appreciation for my strength during the darkest of times has only increased. It reminds me that life is a journey, and healing of any kind takes a lot of patience.
Wasn’t planning to talk about this, but I felt compelled to.
All I can say is: take your time, it’ll get better.
That’s all for today, stay safe.
Ignited Feelings Of Worry
When it comes to fear, or the stresses of certain situations, I often try to analyze and accept what I’m feeling at that particular moment.
Sometimes, it’s not always so easy.
My mind is slightly complex, the same yet different to everyone else’s.
I used to feel shame at getting overwhelmed over some things, it felt like I was the only one at times. (bear in mind, I’ve come a long way and it’s not as bad as it used to be)
To be honest, talking about it shouldn’t have to feel awkward. Everyone has their own struggles and worries, some are just more manageable than others.
And that’s okay, something I often tell myself in notes, diary entries etc.
Life has been a strange and complicated journey, but I’m grateful and blessed in many ways, and I’ve got a good support system.
I’m writing this currently on my phone because I have no energy to use my laptop. Got a few things to do tomorrow, nothing special.
Just hoping that it’ll be okay and I’ll have my peace of mind restored in no time.
This brings us to the end of another blog entry.
I’ll be back tomorrow to share yet another day of thoughts. This is truly a sanctuary for my mind.
God bless you all, and stay safe.
Life Lesson: Bittersweet Outcomes
As much as I am grateful for life as it is today, I can’t help but wonder about what could have been in another outcome of events. I know, it’s kind of ridiculous at this point.
But sometimes, your mind just wants to know.
When you have to discuss certain parts of your life, I suppose the curious side of you emerges.
I’ve learned a lot about my past over the last few years or so. Suppressing your feelings about it is a temporary solution. Such a complex journey, yet I do believe that I have found closure as a result.
We can’t change our pasts, unfortunately. As tough as that is for someone like me in moments like this, all I can do is acknowledge it, process it to the best of my ability and accept it.
That’s easier said than done, ultimately.
As I get older, I do hope that things start to make a little more sense.
Well, maybe I’ll write a book about it, or perhaps a novel of some kind. That’s something I hope to do in my later years. We’ll see if it happens.
Stay safe, and I hope you all have a wonderful evening.
Reflection Hour: Tiny Steps For Change
I promised myself I would write each day on the blog, not because I have anything in particular to express, but with 2020 being such an inactive year on DAYDREAM MADNESS, I wanted 2021 to be different.
The comfort it brings, a very precious gift. As the nights get colder, my mind seems to be all over the place. It is nice to simply feel calm and at peace.
Being kind to yourself and taking life one step at a time is vital sometimes.
High Expectations And Validation From Within
This has been a constant note to self since 2020 began, almost two weeks ago. You don’t need validation from others to be happy.
It doesn’t mean you’re not going to try and get it from other people, or find peace of mind in it. I often compare it to an abyss, the anxieties and self-doubt that comes from the need of validation is not at all helpful.
So many times, I have felt in need of it, and I still don’t understand why, and sure, there are people who have different qualities and different skills, comparing myself to them will only hold me back from achieving what I know in my heart, that I am capable of. It is easier said than done, but with enough patience and faith, anything is possible. And it will happen, when it is meant to.
Until then, I’ll just have to be patient and kind to myself.
The Human Experience
My blog was created almost five years ago, it’s amazing how it has shaped my life in many ways. I used to write all the time, staying awake late thinking about new theme layouts and blog post ideas. Those were the days of limitless creativity.
If anything, I’d love to go back to that. I also hope it will guide me through the writing process for my next poetry book. It might take months, or even years to finish my current project, but in the meantime, just updating my blog consistently and breaking free of the recurring periods of writer’s block.
All you can do is encourage, yet allow that creative mind to express and create at its own pace. I am definitely an impatient person, depending on the situation, of course.
It’s only the beginning, and I have so much left to give. I won’t give up.
Cluttered Set Of Emotions
If hoarding emotions and thoughts was a skill, I’d be a professional at this point in time. Hoping it will become easier as months goes by, and all of that.
To be honest, my writing has definitely impacted somewhat. You analyze yourself and others too much, as well as your surroundings and patterns.
Hard to believe we’re almost two weeks into the New Year, I’ve had a semi-productive timeline as of recent. It’ll pick up eventually, and so will the motivation and inspiration to do bigger and better things with my mind.
Reflection is good, to some extent. Just don’t overdo it, you’ll thank me later.
There is a lot I have to learn, and accept about myself. Bad habits, that one might need to take a second look at. A lot of books I want to read, places I want to visit and appreciate. Nostalgia seems to have hit me , ever so discreetly.
It’s also nearly four years without my grandmother, I am always in disbelief about this. Feels like yesterday when I held her hand, that last smile has replayed in my mind, more times than I can count. Her strength through it all has definitely played a major part. All I want to do is make my guardian angel proud.
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