Tonight, I’ll attempt to get started on my next writing project. In May, it’ll be three years since I independently released my second collection of poetry, A Cryptic Human Entity.
For the longest amount of time, I’ve wanted to begin this process, but a lot has occurred since the last collection and my writing was put on hold indefinitely.
I must admit, the passion to create was lost for a while. I had no particular interest anymore, and it took me a long time to feel like myself again. Writer’s block and personal stress did nothing to help the situation either.
During the first two lockdowns, I found myself prioritizing sleep a lot, right now it’s kind of the opposite because my sleep schedule is out of sync.
I suppose, this time around, it’s the time to focus on my written work.
There’s a lot of ideas and artistic concepts that are running wild in my mind right now and I’m really excited to see what comes out of this. I wish I could draw, if anything. For some reason, I miss painting too. Longing to do it again.
A few titles I have in mind, also. Which one I’ll go with, I have no idea, as of yet. I will trust my instinct on that one. I’ve always been very invested in poem titles and painting a picture.
If I get anywhere with it, I’ll most definitely add some thoughts to the blog tomorrow. Would be great to get used to talking about it all more, as I embark on this journey of expression, saying hello to a new era.
Until then, I’ll leave it at that. Take care, all of you.
As we’re heading into another lockdown, I figured it was time to re-discover my love for books. I have many around the house, perhaps tomorrow I’ll have a look at a few and read them, chapter by chapter. Sounds good.
I also have plans to start work on another book project, I feel like I haven’t paid enough attention to poetry as of late. But in all fairness, life has been quite eventful, to say the least. We’ll see what else 2021 has in store for us.
Might look into subscribing to Audible or something too, I think audiobooks are a good way to pass the time, especially if you haven’t got the chance to read a physical copy.
Another thing I hope to listen more of: podcasts.
If I had a bit more self-esteem and didn’t dislike my voice so much, I am pretty sure I could start my own. Whilst writing, I often say all the words out loud, almost becoming a narrator in the process. That’s one of the many things I have found beneficial over the years.
What I also want to catch up on: Documentaries.
There’s many different ones, from crime to nature, the lighthearted subjects, to the more complex and in-depth. Honestly can’t get enough of them.
Love; a sacred archive of past emotions, the morning sun to our gray beginnings
you were and you still are the object of my affection until oxygen ceases my brain
Continue reading “daydream madness”
It began harmlessly enough, I never expected it to change my perspective of love,
but with all departures; will come sadness. Suddenly, you’re lost in the madness.
Had a charm for days, a smile that could make anyone’s stomach fill
with butterflies just from a simple look. It was muse at first glance
and as I look again on it, maybe it was meant to happen.
You gave me this vibe – a sentimental yet swiftly cold aura, I knew in my heart I’d place you in the depths of my heart. As much as I like to deny it for all it is worth, you truly got me struck with 3 words. From the hello that shaped our moments, to the silent goodbye-
and the spiral of repetition cycles, this was true; regardless of what you think of us now.
”Pistanthrophobia; the fear of trusting”
Drove me mad, but kept me happy. Made me cry, yet you’re the rays of sun on my face,
we made a mess of our time, something we’ll never get back, but I’ll treasure this
and it doesn’t matter if we don’t ever speak again, having you once was enough.
I am not your only love, neither would I expect it from a heart of such charm
although it does get to me, how I’m now the ghost of your past.
Surely, it must have meant the world to you at some point,
or maybe it did not- since you didn’t love me at first chance.
I wish I could understand your reasons for letting go,
because it’d bring me well-needed peace.
I can only hold on to the memories we built-
and the ones we never had the chance to.
I simply can’t get you out of my head
& I wonder if I ever will at this point
a single thought of you drives me insane
with desire to kiss & tell about your soul
magnificent piece of art
whom consumes my mind
you’re like the tattoo I don’t have yet
an image in my head that I’m obsessed with
you’re like the book I haven’t gotten to read
yet the cover is stuck in my head
you’re like the sun that hasn’t shined
yet the rays of light is what I need
you’re like the bad habit I’m currently fighting against
yet it makes me feel so alive whilst losing my breath
you’re the soulmate I wish I could have held
yet I know I can’t look back on damaged love
you’re the world I want to see and explore
but I know I probably won’t see it all
I’m sick of many things, including my love for you
yet it’s the only thing that makes me want to be alive
and try a bit harder to succeed in this path of life
I see you as my world, my sun, my moon
my good, my bad, my heart
my love, my all.
I’m again thinking of the moments of youth
I now wish I had a hold of
the hours turned into years
I found myself encountering fears
& now I have a whole new look at life
I am so glad to have blossomed
into the flower I needed to be
independent and strong
like a young woman should be.
A poem by me:
There’s a song in my head but it doesn’t exist yet
Perhaps the bittersweet melody of life,
That others like to describe.
Or the nostalgic beat of a broken heart’s skip on repeat,
Regardless of the content; I am forever smitten.
Either by your smile, or the haze of false hope,
Whatever it is, it’s in the back of my mind.