Hours That Follow, A Poem Draft From Book #3

There’s something about the midnight hour, I can’t understand how it works, or if it calms my soul enough to heal my battle wounds.

Either way, it builds my core, to the point of nausea. You push yourself to the edge and somehow recover, just to fall back on your word again.

It’s a continuous cycle, the same routine of thought, as time leads you on a journey.

You can either hide in denial, or confront your darkest personality traits in depth.

To cut ties with fear of abandonment, a need for approval; Am I losing touch with reality or am I too aware of my own weaknesses and destructive mindset?

It takes a lot to admit defeat, and admit that you’re a broken individual.

So for the time being, love your fellow entities that surround the halls of your mind. For the present hour, cherish the hours that follow.

Be fearless, love the obstacles that test you. Kill the fear that haunts your path.

Free the mind, cure the anxiety of not knowing what’s going to happen next.

Silent Observation

People assume, because you’re quiet, that nothing bothers you and you are simply not heard.

I have written a thousand times over, but still, ever lost in this maze of emotions and scenarios.

What do I want to happen? I simply cannot tell you. What do I seek from my experiences? Just some clarity, and guidance.

Silence is not a weakness, and I will no longer be silenced.

Stepping Back Into It: Perfectionist Issues

Taking the time to sit down and write something each day is refreshing, to say the very least. For most of last year, I found it impossible to put my ideas into perspective.

As someone who has written for most of her life, I am constantly looking for ways to improve my work, and I definitely found myself editing my words more than usual, rarely satisfied or content with the end result. Maybe, I’m just a perfectionist.

I am hoping that 2019 will put my mind at ease, a little bit. To not worry about people’s opinions so much, and to remember that I am just a human being who is trying to bring herself joy through self-expression as a whole.

This blog has helped me in many ways, which I am forever grateful for. And I met some incredible souls because of it. Can you believe it’s been almost 4 years since I started? Neither can I.

May you all have an amazing year ahead of you.

New Year 2019 – Daily Blog Posts?

Hi everyone, I hope you’ve had an amazing first day of 2019. Just wanted to write a quick post, and I’ll start posting daily on the blog from now on. 2018 was tough, and writing wasn’t fun to do at all previously, so I really wanted to make an effort this time and stick to my word of consistent posts, and have a balanced routine of thoughts, poems, opinions, so forth.

Thank you to the ones who check my blog often, you’re incredible,

to say the least.

I’m excited to see what the year holds for me, personally. Of course, I did a resolutions post about a week and a half ago, which I’ll be trying to focus on.

How was your first day of 2019?

And like I said, I’ll be on here every day from now on. May you all have a wonderful day or night, depending on where you are and such.

Take care, everyone!

Yours Truly,

Mila xo

Breaking The Ice: Heavy Thoughts & Resolutions 2019

Hello, world. I am finally back on the blog, just in time
for my annual resolutions post for the coming New Year.

You have NO idea, just how much I have missed updating-and expressing my thoughts on this platform of mine. For months on end,
I have seen others create incredible content, and envied the fact that their hearts were so inspired and motivated to do so. Keep it up, you inspire me!

Good To Be Writing Again

It’s been a rollercoaster of emotion, bittersweet encounters, and endless obstacles. But through it all, I have kept my composure and sanity in tact.

The same really can’t be said for others, however. I have experienced more betrayal and disloyalty this year, than any other. And to this day, I still can’t wrap my head around it entirely. Truth be told, I gave them enough chances.

A Struggle To Express

For weeks, I have been trying to put together this post as a whole, it was a lot harder than I anticipated. If it wasn’t for the love and support of my family and friends, I would have felt differently about 99% of 2018’s life experiences and unfortunate events. God truly blessed me in that way.

It Was A Tough Year

Ever since the year began, cracks surfaced. Things escalated to the point of no return. The damage has been done, but the strength within, it continues to thrive.

Keep Your Hope Alive

I also found myself closer to religion and faith, which I truly believe has saved me, in more ways than one. When you open your eyes to the truth, you see things from a new perspective. It helps you grow as a person, stay connected to your core beliefs and values.

Reflection & Acceptance

We are not without flaws as human beings, but having the maturity to reflect and learn from our life lessons is so important. You can only dwell on your denial for a certain amount of time, before it all collapses.

You’re Only Human

Sure, a lot of us will keep making tiny mistakes every once in a while, and we’ll most likely never learn entirely, but that’s okay too. Just because you fall once, it doesn’t mean you’re not going to get back up again.

Stay True To You

As long as you’re conscious of what is happening around you, and you’re acknowledging the root causes and accepting it for what it is, that’s a good start. We aren’t perfect, which is what makes us human. Some of us are more reserved, some of us, more outspoken. Individually complex.

For 2019’s resolutions, I wanted to keep it simple and straightforward.

Here’s my tiny list:

  • submit a lot of poetry submissions
  • write for my third book of poems
  • become a healthier person (body, mind etc)
  • read the whole Bible in its entirety
  • upgrade the blog again

What are your resolutions for the New Year?

Obstacles…Where Do I Begin?

Hi all!

It’s Mila here, with a new blog post to share, finally.

Haven’t been posting a lot in recent months, I try and not clog up your feeds with too much emotive rambling, or heavy ranting…although, I have been tempted enough times.

Continue reading

Break Of Hiatus: Society’s A Hypocrite

 

It’s been way too long since I’ve posted a blog post, and I’m sorry about that.

Let’s just say that, life has been hectic for the most part. There is a lot I could add, but I don’t want this to be all about my personal and non-personal issues etc.

But, in the near future, I might feel comfortable sharing a bit more. Anyway, it is SO good to be back writing and expressing my thoughts on DAYDREAM MADNESS.

 

A lot has been going on lately, or, as I like to describe my view of it…

 

an unpredictable cycle, of impulse versus instinct”.

 

On the bright side, my new poetry book is out, I’m slowly (but surely) looking for work to pay more bills off, working on a third collection of poems or stories, to publish this year- or the next. As well as, trying to work on my self-esteem and confidence, because having anxiety over every little thing is a nightmare, when inside of your heart, you know what you want and need out of life, but you’re so lost in your own insecurities, that reaching a little bit higher on the cupboard of life is scary.

 

It’s not that I’m lazy or whatever else people like to call me or define me by. If anything, I’m an extrovert living in an introverted, insecure shell of thought. And it really doesn’t help when certain people define me as something I am not, or when they pile the bricks on, just to step on me further.

 

Why should different rules apply for different people?

 

Aren’t we equal human beings; some richer, some poorer. Some younger, some older. It certainly does get on my last nerve, when people drag you into the dirt, instead of reaching their hand out to help you out of it.

 

Society is the biggest hypocrite – and I’m a part of it, nonetheless. We feed the monster that confines us in our comfort zones and limited spaces. Perhaps not on purpose, but we certainly play a big part.

 

 

 

Health And Book Update: A Late Entry

A late entry but, I finally published and made my second poetry book public via the incredible self-publishing company Blurb, who actually congratulated me also, which I thought was so wonderful!

I’ve been meaning to update my blog, just never got around to it because I took some time to relax because of my wisdom tooth extraction. Recovery is going well! It’s been approximately 4 days and I feel great, there’s been no complications or symptoms which I am relieved about.

The best part about it is, no more excruciating migraines at night. Although today, I feel slightly light-headed, but it’s been a warm day also.

On the 13th, it was the third anniversary of my blog, DAYDREAM MADNESS, too! Can’t believe I’ve had it for this long now. The same day, it was actually a whole year since I bought my domain name; one of the best decisions I’ve made for my blog so far.

 

Getting my new book done was also a big relief, because I was behind schedule, and there’s two different book types; softcover and hardcover. Everyone knows the title of it by now, since it’s been spoken about on numerous occasions.

 

But yes, “A Cryptic Human Entity” was an amazing project to work on, creativity wise.

 

The encouragement and support from my closest friends has been wonderful, especially since it was the second anniversary of my grandmother’s passing on the 19th and all events have been clashing with that.

And it’s also my 23rd birthday this Sunday! Usually not too optimistic about it, but I’ll be at a music festival surrounded by incredible music and good vibes, so I can’t complain.

Growing older is perhaps a blessing and a curse; we’re basically ticking clocks, losing time as we speak. It’s an inevitable fate for us all, but life and loss affects us just as much. The point is, we should cherish each moment like we’re about to lose it all. And we shouldn’t take loved ones for granted either.

You can find out more about my new poetry book, “A CRYPTIC HUMAN ENTITY” here: Blurb